Prepared for a fight, the Seattle Weeklings and last season’s champions, Bumbershoot Hot Dogs, showed up to start this Saucony Winter Season off with a win. But only one team would leave the Thunderdome (Zoo Tavern) as the shuffleboard victors.

Seattle Weekly took set 1 with a 15-11 win, but set 2 wouldn’t be so easy. With the Hot Dogs up 14-2, the despair could be seen in the eyes of the Weeklings as they consoled themselves with beer. Lots of beer. Though, like most great things, the Weeklings accidentally discovered the secret to unlocking their shuffleboard potential: Get drunk. Set 2 saw the greatest beer-fueled comeback in the history of table sports as the Weeklings held off their opponents, 16-14. And just to assert their shuffleboard dominance, they took the last set 18-12. Show no mercy, Weeklings. Show. No. Mercy.

Teams KEXP and Frog Design would show that they would not be in second place as they competed in day 2 of the shuffleboard showdown. Frog Design absolutely pummelled their opponents in set 1 with a double knock-off by the puck of one skilled *ahem* member. Losing 19-4 in the first match, KEXP refused to play the next set lying down. The verbal lashing KEXPer Nate was taking from his fellow teammate must’ve lit the fire under his ass as his final 8 glorious points overtook those Frogs 17-7.

Frog Design and KEXP, now tied set for set, battled it out for the win in the third match. Holding the lead for much of the final set inflated the Frogs’ confidence; how else can you explain Frogger Jason pucking everything up by pushing a lonely KEXP puck into the 4-point category? Congratulations, KEXP, on your win of 16-14. And Frog Design, let’s hope “He frogged it” doesn’t become the new “He Schruted it”.

Next week: Skeeball! (For those not in the know, KEITH OF FROG DESIGN:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skee_ball)

Congratulations to MyOpenBar not only for being totally awesome because they always tell us where to get inebriated for free, but for becoming Chicago’s very FIRST Saucony Office Team Champions!!
The sun was bright on that beautiful Sunday in the spacious area that is Smith Park. Both Threadless & MyOpenBar came to WIN! Competition was tight during Tug of War, Egg Toss, Dizzy Bat & Three Legged Race. It came down to the last game- the wheelbarrow race in which MyOpenBar clinched the victory. WXRT & Venus Zine came out to play as well with WXRT allowing some local teenage boys to play on their team in order to win almost every game against Venus Zine.
After the games, teams headed to Old Oak Tap to revel or drown in free booze & great food!
We hope everyone had as much fun as we did this summer!!!! You’re ALL winners in our book!

Alright, team. Take a knee.

What was that out there?

Seriously…What. The. Hell. Was. That?

Oh, no no no, you guys were great. I’m talking about the weather. It got dark, drizzled a little, then turned, well, gray. Like a color film that all of a sudden became black and white. It hurt my eyes just trying to keep my eye on the ball. And it hurt when the rain drops hit me in the eye(s).

But even though there was a definite lack of heart this week at the game itself (and again, by heart I mean drinking), you never ceased to impress me. Eva with her attempted catching; Amy with her actual catching; Dugan with his crafty pitching; Scott with his pants-on-fire base-running and accusations of cheating. It was a cacophony of beautiful yelling and ball tossing - much like my nights in college - and I couldn’t get enough.

Yes, our opponents made some questionable calls, but don’t let them make you question yourselves. Be stronger than their juvenile taunts, blind-sided base umpiring and run adding/subtracting whims. Though I only remember scoring twice, so that third run, tallied by our unwavering Saucony judge, must have been a pity point.

More importantly, I’d like to talk about the real victory at California Clipper afterwards. My heart swelled with pride when I saw that four members of our team stayed until the bitter end, while only one UR Chicago player did. You can’t cheat in that game. Because then you end up sober. And sobriety, as we all know, is for losers.

That’s dedication. And it’s the kind of dedication that will result in our very first win when we play capture the flag in a couple weeks. W00t, my friends.

W00t.

As our whiffleball games come to a close we reflect on this past week in Chicago with an early reminiscent sparkle in our eye.
Congratulations to game winners this week- MyOpenBar, Threadless & UR Chicago.
Here are a couple links to the games to tide you over until everyone gets their posts up.
Monday’s games and Tuesday’s game!

We will be announcing the next game tomorrow and we really hope you’ll capture the spirit of it!

This week, TOC plays UR Chicago. With our loss last week to the funny t-shirt people still fresh in our minds, we had to pull out the big guns for our TOC Ferocious Player of the Week. And by big guns, we mean big tape guns. Meet Carly Mulliken.

Carly is TOC’s office coordinator. In other words, this place falls apart when she takes a day off. She is also a big trash talker as this interview attests.

Which professional athlete do most people compare you to?
Anna Kournikova, because she’s blond and not that good at sports.

What is your secret weapon?
TOC ad sales assistant Leah Johnston, a.k.a. the Incredible Ginger. She almost fits in my pocket. (At left, actual size)

How good are your whiffle ball skills?
Pretty amazing, you should come watch.

What’s the best song to get psyched up to slaughter your opponent?
“Gonna Make You Sweat” by C&C Music Factory.

Describe your most glorious athletic achievement.
It’s a tie between going to Nationals for swimming at the age of 12 and when TOC kicks UR Chicago’s butt this week.

If your athletic life story were a book, what would be the title?
Berenstain Bears Go Out for the Team. It wasn’t really written about me, but it really sums up my “athletic life story.” It’s about teamwork, sportsmanship and really just putting your best foot forward.

What do you want to say to UR Chicago, our opponent this week?
UR going to lose. Snap!

TOC takes on UR Chicago in a whiffle ball game tomorrow night at 7pm in Humboldt Park and then again in a series of drinking games at the California Clipper at 9pm, when we prove we know more names of old man drinks than they do. If it rains, we’re hitting California Clipper at 8pm. Because we’re dedicated sporting professionals.